What a shitty month.

Well, just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, they did. After feeling like shit for the entire last week, I was really hoping that this week would be so much better. Iced Earth was in town 2 days ago, some of my classes were to be canceled, and everything was just gonna go smooth. Oh was I wrong.

Sunday morning (September 19th) I woke up with horrible stomach ache. I thought it was just from eating too much at work the night before, so a couple trips to the bathroom would just flush it out and I'd feel better. I had planned to get a lot of stuff done that day, so I wanted to fix this as fast as possible. I didn't feel any better after, and later on, I began throwing up. After throwing up a few times, I just did what I could to sleep all day. I had no appetite at all, a horrible stomach ache, and later on that day, it spread to my appendix area. I thought that I should be going to the hospital, but I tried to make it through the night at home. I wasn't planning on going to school the next day for sure.

I woke up at 2 in the morning with the worst pain ever in the stomach and appendix area. I was moaning and attempting to sleep for 4 hours straight, when at 6 A.M. I decided that I needed to go to the hospital. My dad took me and later that morning I was given a CAT scan to see what was up with my stomach. Turns out I had appendicitis. Amazing. When I thought things couldn't get shittier for me, my entire Sunday was wasted, and I had to have my appendix removed and be in the hospital for another day. I also had tickets to Iced Earth the next day, so I couldn't go to that anymore. I also planned on visiting my friend at U of I this upcoming weekend, that's not happening either. All my plans were ruined.

The surgery went good, not like I could remember anything, but I was still in pain throughout the day. I was given a lot of painkillers throughout the day which helped me sleep, so that was good. My relatives came to visit me after the surgery throughout the afternoon which made me feel a lot better. I was supposed to leave Tuesday morning, but the surgeon had to check on me to make sure I was good to go. Of course, he was busy throughout the morning and day so I didn't get discharged from the hospital until 3 in the afternoon. I was in pain all that night, and walking is hard to do, but is becoming easier every day. But now, I can't really do anything. No working out, I don't have enough energy to go back to school yet, so I'm stuck at home all day doing nothing. How wonderful.

I contacted my teachers about quizzes and homework I missed and basically everything is all good. They extended my homework and I'm able to make up any quizzes I missed, so that's great. I have to go back on Friday to take a math exam, but I should be ready to go back by then anyway. Today I plan on getting an oil change for my car and possibly going to the mall to get out of the house. I'm feeling a lot better physically, so I'm able to do more things. By the first or second week of October I should be painless, right before my concert streak begins.

Emotionally, however, I'm feeling like shit. Again, right when I thought things couldn't get shittier, they did. I'm also coming to realize more things that I should have a long time ago. My relatives came all the way from DeKalb to see me in the hospital when they found out about it. Some of my friends found out about what happened, and only 3 of them asked me in some way if I was feeling better. I always knew that family will be with you the rest of your life, and that friends come and go, and every day I'm starting to lose more trust and hope in my friends. It's really becoming more evident that they don't give a shit about me, and I shouldn't be wasting my time with them. Again, I've gone out of my way and will do whatever to help them, but when it comes to me asking for one little thing, it's apparently not worth their time. None of them would want to hang out with me if it was just me and them, and I'm just there as a third wheel. We all planned on visiting a friend in Indiana in a couple weeks and going to a hog roast, but I don't think I'll be coming with. There's no point in me coming if none of them are going to interact with me, if anything they'll probably use me to drive them again and nothing more. I don't think that they would care if I didn't go anyway.

Again, September has been a very shitty month for me, and I really don't think that some freak miracle is gonna happen between now and the end of it that will make me change my mind otherwise. With all the shows I'm going to in October, and my cousin's wedding, I'm sure it will be an awesome month.

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